🦋 Pearly Pearls

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Tears

are running 

down my cheeks. 

Tears are dripping 

down my face. Silent 

tears for nobody to witness. 

Nobody to watch. For nobody *

to hear. Nobody to feel. For nobody

to know anything about. Only I can tell 

by the way my hands are trembling. Nobody 

knows and no one can ever tell because I cover 

my silent tears with a genuine smile and a happy face. 

With a face that lights up a whole room and a whole 

world even. Because that is how I deal. How I deal with 

the pain. My pain as well as others. I transform my grief *

into pearls, pearls with a happy ending. An ending where I get 

to decide on what matters and what not. An ending where my 

tear drops transform into artifacts for the whole wide world to 

display. I cover my teary eyes and I make pearls of them pearls. 

* I cover up my grief with pearls. Beautiful pearls. I cover my 

hurt with the most gorgeous pearls. Pearls that fill a whole 

* necklace. A necklace for any beloved and embodied *

* * soul to wear on a sleeve or a golden plate * *

* * * * * for that matter. * * * * *

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To 

wear 

like a 

crown. 

Like they 

had the whole 

world as they should

be known. Like they were 

meant to be crowned. With 

a crown and a golden bracelet 

to accentuate the necklace. I cover 

up my tears by picking up all the shattered 

pieces of my broken heart. All the pieces that 

are scattered all over the world. And I piece them 

together to go along with my beating heart. Heart–

beat by heartbeat. With every heartbeat. Tender heart–

beat. I feel it with every heartbeat. With every heartbeat. 

I cover them by sharing my thoughts and feelings with every 

single soul I stumble upon, strangers as well as foes in this 

strange & peculiar world we live in. In a world where artificial

intelligence overrules any other human intelligence or human

interaction for that matter. Praise the lord. Praise the inventions.

Praise the inventors. But what about human connections? What

about a human touch? A single and gentle touch to remind us 

of why we are here on earth. You might wonder what on

Mother Earth I go about my grief like this. By sharing my

pearly pearls, 

it enables me to be and remain true to my nature and the core 

of who I am. It is also the ultimate way for me to embrace *

every bit, every ounce, every denounce, every emotion,

* * * every breath, every sigh, every nuance. * * *

* * * * * * *

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And 

then I 

tune into 

that beating 

heart of mine. 

I tune in my grief 

to my heartbeat. I let 

my heart beat the crap out 

of me and my pain until I fall. 

Until I fail. Until there is nothing else 

to prevail. Until I surrender. Until I stoop. 

Until I stop.Until I devour. Until I break. Until 

I break so hard that I become unbreakable and *

unbendable. That is when I stop. This is my cue. This 

is when I have become unbreakable and no one can make 

me or break me like I once broke myself into a thousand 

shattered pieces. I was broken. I broke down. I was broken 

in a broken world. I am no longer broken because I, now, 

own a dozen pearly necklaces, all hand made, all self-made, 

all tailor-made. And I spread them all over the world. I am 

piecing together my brokenness and I tell the world about 

my scars, every single fragment. Then I make a whole *

* set of new pearls. Unbreakable pearls. Untouchable 

* * ones. Unmendable because they have been * *

* * mended and mended until every single * *

* * * * crack was visible. * * * *